


The Old College Try

by ShortForPhill



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternate Universe - Professors, Bruce is on the no-fly list, Loki is a Diva, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Post-Divorce, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, but for extremely valid reasons
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:20:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27374116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShortForPhill/pseuds/ShortForPhill
Summary: Post-divorce, Tony takes up a job at Shield Technical Institute in hopes of a new startFellow professor Bruce and his husband Thor think Tony just might be the missing piece their relationship needs
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Thor, Tony Stark/Bruce Banner/Thor
Comments: 1
Kudos: 21





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’d like to thank my brother for going to a school with a literal human penis as a mascot for inspiring Shield Technical Institute

“There’s a new professor on campus,” Thor announces one day as he invades Bruce’s office.  
“What department?” Bruce asks.  
“Science.”  
“Thor. Science is not a department.” Thor grins, unrepentant. He’s clearly been hanging out with Loki too much recently.  
“I hear he has multiple PhDs.”  
“What? How many?” Bruce is the reigning champion of PhDs. He has seven. Nobody else has that many, except maybe Charles Xavier. Professor Xavier doesn’t count because he only got extra degrees for the joy of knowledge. Bruce got seven PhDs because of spite, the only valid motivation.

Thor laughs. He knew that would get Bruce’s attention. His husband can be delightfully predictable sometimes. Perhaps a little too predictable lately. They like to bring new people into their bed from time to time. Thor is hoping the new professor will be game.

“Does he have more than me?” Bruce demands.  
“Perhaps you should ask him yourself,” Thor suggests.  
“Hang on,” Bruce finally catches on to Thor’s game. “Is he cute? Thor, is he pretty? Have you seen him?”  
“I admit, I only caught a glimpse from behind.”  
“And how was his behind?”  
“It’s a bubble butt.”  
“Thor. We gotta. For science.”  
“For fun, too, I hope.”  
“Of course,” Bruce grins. Thor beams back. 

—————

Across campus, Tony looks down in dismay at his school-branded welcome kit. Shield Technical Institute is a very prestigious small private college. It also has the worst acronym. “STI” stares up at him from the sweatshirt.

“Can I change my mind?” Tony wonders.  
“Too late,” Phil Coulson informs him with a completely straight face.  
“The students have really embraced it,” Maria Hill adds, also with a straight face, “Our mascot is a crab.”  
“His name is Itchy,” says Nick Fury, who might be an evil spy, as he holds up a bright red plush crab with googly eyes and a cartoon smile. It’s a bit unsettling.

“Uh. I’m gonna go set up my office,” he says. “I think you’ve given me enough school spirit.”   
“It’s very important to spread school spirit,” Nick Fury informs him, as seriously as if he’s discussing national security.   
“Ok stop,” Tony grins in spite of himself. 

“We’re glad to have you on board, Stark,” Fury admits.  
“I do appreciate you taking me on,” Tony replies, honesty for honesty. “I needed a fresh start.” His divorce was finalized a mere week ago. The whole process was miserable. His ex got all their friends in the split. So he called in a favor with Pepper, who got Happy and Rhodey to help move him across the country, where Shield Technical Institute was willing to hire him on Pepper’s word.  
“You’ll do great here,” Phil reassures him. Tony nods. Nick hands him the plush crab. It’s surprisingly soft. Yeah, this might be exactly what he needs.


	2. Chapter 2

“So, you must be the new professor.” Tony jumps, startled by the man who seems to have appeared in his doorway out of nowhere.  
“Uhh, yeah,” he stammers, “Who- Who are you?”  
“Loki Laufeyson,” the man introduces himself. He enters Tony’s office, striding forward with all the grace and poise of a queer-coded cartoon villain. He looks it too, with his jet-black hair and pale skin and eyes that are just a bit too green.   
“Uh. I’m Tony. Tony Stark.”  
“You seem to have settled in nicely.” Loki glances around the (mostly) unpacked office with an approving eye.  
“Thanks?”  
“I take it you haven’t met the rest of the faculty?”  
“Not yet. Should I know who you are?”  
“Oh, I don’t work here.” Tony stares at him. Loki’s smirk widens into a full grin.

“Loki!!” someone bellows from down the hall. Thundering footsteps sound from a distance.  
“Ah, that would be my brother,” Loki confides, still grinning. “He’ll never think to look for me in here.”  
“What does he teach?” Tony wonders.  
“Thor?” Loki scoffs. “That oaf couldn’t teach a fish to swim.” Tony stares again.  
“Do you actually know anyone here, or am I about to get murdered?”  
“Is murder usually your first assumption?” Loki raises an eyebrow at that. Tony fidgets, uncomfortable.  
“It’s a recent concern,” he admits. Loki frowns.

Before Tony can offer an explanation, Loki turns abruptly and leaves. He returns mere seconds later with a large muscly blonde in tow.  
“You must be Professor Stark,” the giant golden retriever of a man beams at him. “It’s nice to officially make your acquaintance.”  
“Uhh... Just Tony is fine,” Tony manages to respond.  
“I am Thor Odinson. I see you’ve met my brother Loki.”

“Norse,” Tony says stupidly.  
“Indeed,” Thor nods. “Though we haven’t been back to visit in some time.”  
“So, uh, why are you here?” Tony blurts out. “I mean, at the school? Loki says you don’t teach? Shit. I’m usually less of a disaster.”  
“We run the local theatre,” Thor explains. “I’m here to collect my husband for lunch. You should join us.”  
“I’d hate to intrude.”  
“Nonsense! Loki will be joining us, as will some other friends.”  
“Okay, sure. I could use some new friends.” Tony suddenly finds himself enveloped in a big bear hug.   
“Wonderful!” Thor exclaims. Loki just smirks when Tony squeaks in reply.

——-

“Is there an option to participate remotely?” Bruce asks, “Flying isn’t an option for me at the moment.”  
“I can certainly ask,” Dr Helen Cho offers. “You’re not the first to suggest a virtual component. It would allow us to expand and diversify the conference.”  
“Let me know if that’s the case. I’d definitely be interested then.”  
“Certainly, Dr Banner.”  
“Thanks.”

Bruce hangs up with a sigh.  
“Any luck?” Thor pokes his head in the office.  
“Maybe. You catch Loki?” The little shit had glitter bombed his stack of syllabi. Again.  
“Indeed. And we have made a friend.” Thor always makes friends. 

Of course, those friends aren’t usually extremely attractive men with big Bambi eyes and a perfect ass. So this must be Professor Stark.

“Hi,” the man in question waves awkwardly, “I’m Tony.” He looks small, sandwiched between Thor and Loki, but he’s clearly in shape.  
“Bruce Banner.”  
“Oh! I read your paper on anti-electron collisions! Ground breaking stuff!” Tony lights up as he talks science. His expression falters as he notices the green glitter all over Bruce’s desk and hands. “Is there some kind of holiday I don’t know about?”  
“Loki,” Bruce replies. That’s usually enough of an explanation. Tony glances at Loki, whose smug grin confirms his involvement. Tony shifts a little closer to Thor. Smart man.

“Are you ready for lunch?” Thor asks. “Tony has agreed to join us.”  
“Yeah,” Bruce nods. “Let me just wash up.” He waves his glitter-covered hands at them. Tony giggles, though he quickly tries to cover his reaction. Thor glances at Bruce with an expression better suited to asking if he can keep a stray kitten. Bruce nods to Thor, then offers Tony a grin. He walks past the trio to go wash his hands, but not before smearing some of the glitter on Loki. Loki’s outraged squawk is its own reward, but Tony’s startled laughter makes it even better. He’s definitely a keeper.


End file.
